Everything's on fucking fire and I love it

I waited way too long to see Mad Max: Fury Road. I watched it about a week ago when I should have made the time to go to a midnight showing and then made the time to go see it every night since.

Fuck! Fucking yes!

I was raised on a steady diet of Mad Max films. I had a Mad Max themed wedding. I should have known that I would love Fury Road, but I hesitated for some reason and now I'm kicking myself.

Look, if you don't like shit on fire or explosions or car chases through the middle of the desert or lots of awesome fight scenes you probably won't like this movie. But then again if you don't like those kinds of things you probably aren't going to read a blog with "Motherfucker" in the title and so I'm not talking to you anyway. But if you DO like those things, and also like characters with pathos and complicated stories and little hope then you'll enjoy the shit out of this film.

Also, it's goddamned stunning. The whole thing is shockingly beautiful and also super impressive when you realize exactly how many of the stunts and special effects were in-camera.

And, yes, it's a big, hairy, delightfully feminist vagfest. There are lots of women in this movie. Almost without exception they kick absolute ass. Fucking deal with it - if you're pissed off that fictional females can have agency (and can even give orders to and defy the orders of men) you're a garbage person.

In that vein I left the theater deciding that I wanted to be Furiosa when I grow up. I was feeling ecstatic and punchy and happy. I walked back to a car when some random dude stopped me and this dialogue ensued:
Dude - "You look amazing!"
Me - *nervously laughing* "Ahah, uh, thanks?"
Dude - *said while staring at my tits* "And when you look amazing you feel amazing, and honey, I bet you feel amazing"
Dudes at table next to us - *general guffawing, one dude speaking* "Yeah man, get it."
Me - *deciding this is not a safe/appropriate venue to completely lose my shit on people in spite of going from feeling happy and badass 30 seconds before to nervous and completely aware that if this ends badly for me it is going to end very badly* "Haha, okay, bye."

Which is when I decided I need an angry vagina on a shirt to ward off comments like that. So I went home angry and designed this:

So, in short, Fury Road is awesome and don't tell strange women that you think their tits must feel amazing.

Cheers,
     - Alli